Remember the ill-fated house viewing with Hatchet Face and her idiot husband a few weeks ago? Well that house is just up the road from where my parents live. Mother delightfully informed me that when she was on the way to the bus stop on Saturday she saw the front window boarded up. Someone’s only gone and bricked it through! Ha! I guess karma does exist.

Brad: There’s a band called Anorexia Nervosa.
Me: I wish I had anorexia sometimes.
Brad: I’m glad you don’t.
Me: Why?
Brad: Because then you’d die.
Me: People don’t always die when they have anorexia.
Brad: You would.

See how much faith my boyfriend has in me?

As well as plucking/shaving (obv) my eyebrows I also need to:

• stop eating crap food.
• start exercising more.
• do a wardrobe clearout.
• get booked in with Sway.
• make a comprehensive list of peoples’ Christmas presents.
• find the counterpart section of my provisional.
• perfect my French.
• call up the estate agents to book a viewing on that apartment.
• write more.
• bin anything that can be deemed as ‘clutter’.
• take some books to the charity place.
• watch Mean Girls.
• decide what to take to Leeds.
• find a lovely winter coat.